Do You Make This Crucial Mistake When Calling a Girl for the First Time?
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Neutralizing your ex's power over you
No. 2 in the series “What everybody ought to know about dating“.
Have you ever wondered at what point you should call a girl after getting her number? Call too soon and you will be seen as desperate and needy,
call too late and she will have lost interest, or forgot you.
I guess that your goal for this call will be to get a date with her, so of course your choice of words, voice, tone etc. will matter more than the timing,
but you know, the devil is in the details. You might as well maximize your chances.
Her level of interest is what determines if she says yes or no to meeting again, and let me tell you one thing: It never stands still. Kind of like stock prices,
her interest always INcreases, or DEcreases. And you want to call her when it’s highest.
So when IS IT highest?
As you might have figured out already, there is no definitive answer to this. As with most things here in life, it depends on the situation.
But not entirely, here’s 5 tips to get it right:
- As a rule of thumb, never call on the same night as you’ve met her. By this time, you has not really “sunk” into her mind just yet.
Give her a chance to think about you, it’s at this point your call will have the biggest impact, and is most likely to succeed.
- Be polite when calling. Ask her if she has the time to chat. If she says yes sure, that’s great. If she says no: Don’t hang up! Just tell her that you will make it quick. This usually works, and it spares you a whole lot of trouble, instead of having to get a hold of her… again!
- The answering machine is your friend. This is a fantastic opportunity to show of a lot of self-confidence. Just make it short, something like:
“Hi, this is John from last night. You know, the sexy dark haired guy from the supermarket. I just wanted to say hi, and ask you if you would like to meet again. Get back as soon as possible, that would be great. Bye.”
Just remember to introduce yourself, and make your point clear. And if you can incorporate humour, your message simple can’t fail.
- Don’t wait too long. This kind of depends how you got her number, but don’t wait more than 3 days. She might have “lost hope” in you, she might have forgotten you or she may have met a new man. There’s thousands of possibilities.
- Don’t call her in the middle of the night.
- And for god’s sake, be sober!
Don’t talk for too long!
This is probably one of the best tips I can give you to maximize your chances for getting a date. Please don’t talk to her for more than a few minutes.
Actually the shorter the better. This is not the time to “getting to know her”. Just drop her the question, want to meet for coffee tomorrow? Or anything you come up with.
Though I am not saying that you shouldn’t say hi, ask her how she is, or just talk general things. Just remember the point of this call; you want to meet her again. Everything else comes second.
With this post, I hope that I have made you aware of some of the problems you might be facing, and / or having when calling a girl (for the first time).
To wrap it up: Don’t call on the same night, be polite, talk to her answering machine if she isn’t there, call at a reasonable time, don’t wait too long, don’t talk for too long and be sober.
Do you have a story about calling a girl, or do you always have the same troubles? Leave ’em in the comments.
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