This post is about change. Personal change. Self-improvement.

Cause’ that’s what this whole ‘getting better with girls’ thing is all about anyway. Change.

So how do you do it best? Most efficient? Smartest? Quickest? And is quick necessarily good? Dive in for some hot shot answers…

The game has more than one solution

Usually when you talk about ‘the game’, you talk about the so-called seduction community and all it stands for. There are many schools of thought, many techniques, many experts, but the end goal for all of them is the same thing: to get more and better girls.

One of the biggest mistakes a newcomer to all this material can make is to follow something mindlessly. What usually happens is that you become disconnected from your core, and if you have read “The game” by Neil Straus, you know how that can turn out.

Basically, you’ll feel like you lose control over yourself. All your friends suddenly turn against you, because they can’t recognize you any more. You’ll get into a bad spiral, deeper and deeper, farther and farther away from your true self.

So what’s important is that you stay rooted in your self-improvement process. It’s important to stay true to you, and to not change too quickly. If you go from being the ultimate mother’s boy one day, to being the worst of the worst badboys the next, you’re going to have some congruency problems.

Change gradually

Instead of changing from one day to the next, make the change gradually. Whatever it might be. Change takes time – it is a physical law.

So just play it cool. You don’t have to hurry to change. If you make just one new, good habit every week, you’ll get far. But on the other hand, if you do everything overnight, there’s a big risk of losing yourself in the process.

Personal change and development perfectly aligns with weight training. You don’t just go in one day and bench press 200 kgs. No! You build it up slowly over time.

It will take time, but the results will be much better in the end, and you won’t risk getting injuried along the way.

It’s the journey, not the destination

As I’ve said before, and it’s crucial: It’s not the goal, it’s the path that’s important! (wow, lots of apostrophes in that sentence!…)

Meaning that it is actually the road, and not the destination, that is the whole travel (and goal).

So don’t focus too much on short-term results.

Focus on small improvements

Instead, just focus on small improvements over time. Said hi to one girl today? Great!

Don’t feel bad for not saying hi to two. You’ll do that next time. Or if it’s really overwhelming, the time after that. Just don’t go to the “next level” before you’re ready.

But also, don’t stall and stay at the same level for too long. You’ll lose momentum, and therefore also progress.

If you do stall, take a step back and review your progress. If you have come to a barrier, like asking for the number, work hard and push through it. Remember the words you hear so often: Just do it.

It’s really not that bad, whatever it is. You’ll still live afterwards, I promise :-)

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Beautiful image by Beat.

Truth is, most guys don’t live the life they want.

Something is always wrong. Friends, work, family, girlfriends, whatever.

But let me tell you one thing: All of these problems seem so much easier to solve if you know that you can go out at anytime, and go up and talk to any girl you want, and get her number.

And not only that. You also know that you can get on a date with her. And you know that there’s a big chance that this date leads to more… Physical contact between you.

It’s really a fantastic feeling. And I want you to have it too!

That’s basically why I started this blog. To make you feel good about your life and help you live it to the fullest.

For most, a part of the good life includes being with attractive women.

Chances are, if you’re not with the women you desire now, you won’t ever be… If you don’t start working on it soon.

One way to “learn the skill of meeting women” is to get into the seduction community.

The seduction community

Wikipedia definition:

“The seduction community is a loose-knit subculture of men who strive for better sexual and romantic success with women through self-improvement and a greater understanding of social psychology.”

What I’m teaching is simply self-improvement.

So no, I’m not trying to manipulate women to have sex with me. Far from it!

How I got into the community

There’s a good chance that if you’re reading this post, you have also read one of my other posts called “Date Like a Movie Star Without Looking Like Brad Pitt“.

If not, I suggest that you read it before continuing here.

To quickly summarize though, the article is about how I was really down on life, and then one day met a great guy called Peter.

You could say that he inspired me to take charge of my own life, and change what needed to change.

One of the things I did was to go online and look for material like most guys do.

I found a book

In my search, I found a book. I found a lot of books actually, but the first book I bought on the topic of meeting women was a really important one.

I’ll review it in the next post here on the blog.

At first I just skimmed through it, thinking that this entire seduction thing was crap.

Body language was important when talking to girls? Looks didn’t matter (much)?

I didn’t believe it at all, it was like a whole new world.

I told Peter that I had bought this book, and believe it or not, he had too. A few years ago when he was “getting started” he had been looking for help, just like me.

Turns out it was an extremely popular book that has been helping thousands of guys all over the world for years.

Peter told me that I should go home and read the book again, with a less skeptical point of view this time.

And that’s how I got into the “seduction community“.

Reading the book with a new motivation

So I did what Peter said, I read it again.

Actually, I think I read it 5-6 times in just 3 days.

Because I felt that I was getting so confident, that I knew everything there was to know, I got out on a Friday night to “test my new skills”.

It went absolutely fantastic. I got three phone numbers that night. And two more the next day.

On Sunday, I set up dates for all those girls each on their own day in the upcoming week.

Some of them were cute, great to talk to etc., some of them weren’t.

But that really wasn’t the point; I could now go out anytime and get a date!

That Friday night, after I had finished my last date, it felt amazing. I just couldn’t stop smiling.

Actually I think I fell asleep with a smile on my face. And it continued through the whole next week.

People started asking me why I was so happy etc. but I just replied that I had finally started living.

In just a month or two, I had turned my life completely around.

If someone would have told me this a few months before, I wouldn’t have believed them. I would probably just have laughed and walked away, thinking “what a moron” or similar.

The people around me found me much more attractive because of my newfound happiness. Things went better at work, I had so much more fun with my friends, I had started talking to more people in shops and on the streets etc.

You could say I had started a “positive spiral”. All because of a change in mind; and a change in action.

The feeling that you can get a date whenever you want is just incredible.

In the following year, I got A LOT of dates.

But my plan was never to meet a lot of girls. Not at all.

Like most guys, I wanted to find a nice girl to make my girlfriend. A girl to walk with in the park, a girl to hold me warm at night, a girl to celebrate Christmas with, a girl to introduce to my family, you know what I mean.

But quality girls are hard to find, and that’s why I went on so many dates. It’s only a matter of chance before you find someone you really “click” with.

And as I had thought, after a few months, I found a really amazing girl. We were together for almost a year, and this was actually my first real relationship that I was happy with in my whole life.

But enough about me.

This post is about you.

How you can get started living the life you want

First of all, I’ll say congratulations. Just by reading this, you’re on the right path to get a better life (and start meeting more women).

That’s great. But we both know that you can get better.

My first suggestion is that you keep reading my posts.

As said earlier, I’ll review the book I talked about in an upcoming post. So stay tuned, and if you’re not a subscriber, I suggest that you subscribe to this blog now.

That way you won’t lose a single post, and you can read em’ whenever you want.

So that’s all great. My second suggestion is that you really read the review I post, and seriously consider buying the book.

And after buying the book, I suggest that you go out, and test out all the new material and techniques and cool stuff you have got.

Maybe you’ll have great success with it, maybe it’ll take a little time.

But when you get really good, all this doesn’t matter. You’re seriously going to have the time of your life, for the rest of your time on this planet. Not too bad, eh’?

So let’s call it a wrap for this time.

Stay tuned for the review, and remember:

It’s never too late to start living.

Peace!
Alex

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Images by tookie, cariephoto and moriza.