Have you ever been in that situation where you were at this amazing New Year’s party, yet still, you weren’t really enjoying it?

I know that I have. And I know why… It was because I knew that on midnight, I had no one to kiss.

And when everyone around you has a girlfriend or is dating someone, that really gets smacked right in your face.

…Well, tonight you’re not going to be standing alone, watching all the other guys kissing hot girls when the bell hits midnight.

If you want someone to kiss on New Year’s Eve, do this:

When you arrive at the party, be sure to be really social. Introduce yourself to everyone with an upbeat energy and be sure to get to know how they know the host, who they came with etc.

When you have talked to a few people, you can start introducing them to each other.

It doesn’t matter that you aren’t the host – just make people feel at ease, and they’ll instantly like you and perhaps even feel intrigued by you.

(A bonus to doing this is also that you’ll know which girls are single and which girls aren’t)

If walking up to “strangers” to start conversations makes you uncomfortable, remember to simply relax. Stay open, keep breathing and you’ll be fine. Take a look at these posts:

• Start Breathing When It Matters The Most and Get More
• Bantering: Now You Can Get Women, Be Social and Have a Blast at the Same Time
• Why Self Limiting Beliefs are your Worst Enemy when it comes to Approaching Girls
• How Learning to “Talk Woman” will Triple Your Success with Women

Pick the cutest girl

Later on in the night, walk up to one of the cutest (single) girls that you have been talking to.

After some small talk, whisper something like this in her ear: “What do you say… do you want to be my New Year’s date?”

And if she asks you what that would mean or what it implies, you can say that it means that you’ll act like a couple and watch the fireworks together “Perhaps holding hands… We’ll see!”

Be sure to say it with a smile though – you don’t want to come of as a creep!

If she says yes (and she will if you played your cards right) you’re in, pal.

Watch the fireworks with her, and when the bell hits midnight, it will be the most natural thing to kiss her.

Voila! A great evening and a great kiss for just being social and charming at the same time.

And by the way, if you ever feel like you’re “running out of things to say”, just talk about what her year has been like or how she would likw the new year to be. Some interesting conversations can really spur from that.

Thank you!

On another note, I want to thank you all for making 2011 such an awesome year. This year, I have been in close contact with a lot of you, and I will continue to do so in 2012. So if you have any questions regarding dating, relationships or the lack of them, hit me up with a message and we’ll talk. Let’s make 2012 our best year yet together.

Have a great evening everybody, and take care!

Ps. Remember that my offer for the ebook ends TONIGHT. To get The Ex-Girlfriend Solution for $19 instead of $27, act now by clicking here.

I just had huge realization. It hit me kind of hard – and I must say that I am relieved. It really helped me to take a pretty big burden off my shoulders.

I just realized that the first 10% are always the hardest and both mentally and physically the toughest. After the first 10%, you’re in the groove, and you just go with it. You follow the next natural step all the way to the end.

Am I speaking in code? Let me explain. When I go for a run, the biggest step I have to climb first is by far getting into my shorts and out of the door. When I have done that, running is the natural thing to start doing. And the first 10% of that run is always the hardest.

It’s in those first 10% that the little voice inside my head says to me that it is a silly idea to exercise now – it’s cold, it’s dark and I have better things to do.

If I can fight that little voice for the first 10%, I have beaten it. Sure, he tells me to stop when it hurts and I can’t breathe, and he says I need to slow down when I am going all out in a sprint at the end. But here, my momentum has built for so long that there is no way in hell that I listen to him.

It’s only in those first 10% that he has any power

That little voice has nothing to say after the first 10%.

So what does that really mean? It means that half the battle is deciding that you want to do something, and then taking the first step. The rest is not that hard – it will just come to you. It’s those first 10% that takes creativity, ambition, strength and decisiveness.

It’s not only related to working out and physical activities.

It’s related to everything.

Walking up to that girl you find cute is much harder than actually talking to her and flirting with her when you are with her.

To shut off the TV and start doing your homework is much harder than actually doing your homework.

You get the point.

It’s all an illusion

The way your mind works is often by figuring out the worst possible scenario, and then preparing you for it by showing it to you internally. That’s why you can see a picture of yourself getting slapped in the face by a girl, just for walking over and talking to her before actually doing it.

Or why you see yourself crying in the corner of your room after your girlfriend has broken up with you – before she even has.

These pictures are very seldom showing the truth.

They are showing twisted pictures of reality, just so you won’t by any chance get hurt. It’s all a defence mechanism. If you are safe right now, your body really does not want you to try new things. What could you possibly gain?

Doing the stuff you know well is the safe choice. It’s dull, but easy.

Your body doesn’t really care about things like happiness and joy. All it cares about is safety for you and your offspring. Your genes just want to survive!

But I know that you think differently. You want to do things, explore things, enjoy things. And that my friend, takes guts.

Back to the 10%

You are nervous before the race – but when you’re racing, you’re just racing.

The next time you want to do something, but you are doubting whether or not to do it, try thinking about those first 10%.

What do you need to do to get started? Pack your bags? Make that phone call?

Before starting, it always helps to have a clear idea on what you need to do get from point A to point B – with point A being where you are now, and point B being where you want to be.

If you do that, and you overcome the first 10%, you can already see the finish line.

Images by WayTru, jon- and Jenny P. Thanks!

We’ve all seen it happen way too many times. You’re out with your friends enjoying a few beers when a group of girls walks in. The venue is perfect, the night feels good, and you know that if you and your friends were to walk up and start talking with these girls the night would be, well, magical.

You lean into your friends saying, “Guys, see those girls over there?”

“Yeah!”
“They’re so hot!”
“Wow!”

“Okay, we’re going to go approach. Let’s go.” You make a move to get up but your friends stay stuck in their seats, not moving. “Guys, come on,” you say.

“No man, they’re not that hot, let’s wait until…”

But the girls are hot, you know that and you know they know it. You push, but your friends won’t budge. They are not getting up and they never will.

Clearly there is a huge difference here.

What is that difference? You have confidence in yourself while your friends lack the same measure. Alex and I have been talking in back and forth e-mails, trying to figure out the best way to gain confidence. We’ve come upon two distinct things you’ll need: The ability to beat fear, and a game plan.

Alex has already discussed beating fear so we’ll talk about game plans today!

Love has been compared to war thousands of times in literature – for good reason. Love and war are both a fight; they take effort and struggle. Neither is easy. As with anything that takes effort, you need some kind of strategic plan. Imagine being in a war and not having any kind of strategy. How bad would that go? Actually, that’s not hard to see at all, look at what’s happening in Iraq.

Is that what you want to turn your love-life into?

Love is no different from war in the necessity of having a plan. Obviously you can’t (and wouldn’t want to) plan everything out in advance. That’s what turns you into a robot and takes the fun out of it. On the other hand, if you’re just starting out you’ll find a game plan to be a crucial element in helping you build confidence. If you’re a seasoned veteran of seduction you’ll know the truth in the line, “You have to know where you’re headed if you’re going to get there at all.”

The game plan is having some kind of an idea of what you’re going to do. That group of girls walks into the bar and you instantly know exactly what’s going to happen.

Your game plan consists of four things:

1. Knowing how the conversation will start: What are you going to say to hook her in.
2. Knowing where the conversation will go: Forward, I hope. In a direction that will make her like you and feel connected to you.
3. Knowing where the conversation will end: Are you chasing after a phone number? Instant date? E-mail (please no!)?
4. It’s good to have a series of contingency plans: When do you bail? This didn’t work so what do I do now, etc.

The more advanced you get, the less of a game plan you’ll need – you’ll have the confidence to do what you know will work. If you’re just starting out then it most definitely will not hurt to have things planned out in advance.

If you can combine your ability to face fear with a well developed game plan, there is nothing that’s going to stop you from getting your confidence to the level you want.

Note from Alex: Thanks Derek! Hope that it was of some use, guys. Derek has his own blog called Epic Nights, it contains some pretty cool articles, so you might want to check it out :-)

Also, don’t forget to subscribe (for free) to the article feed. Click here to read all about it, or go straight to the rss page.

First image by Keltic, second one by Chantrybee. Thanks!

Last night I met a beautiful girl named Lisa in the video rental store. It was amazing.

I had every excuse in the book not to walk up and talk to her: I had been up for more hours than I could possibly count because I returned from my trip to India that morning (Hard to sleep in the plane when you’re a tall guy like me!)

So not only was I really tired; I also looked like a mess. My clothes was rather dirty, my hair looked awful, and I just wanted to go home, watch a movie and fall asleep.

But there she was, looking at some romantic comedy all by herself.

First I had all these fears running through my head: Is she going to reject me? Am I going to be humiliated? Will she laugh at me? Will it be awkward?I took a deep breath, and realized that my thoughts had no base in reality. I made friends with the fear.

And then I walked up right next to her and picked the same movie that she had in her hands. After skimming the backside for roughly 10 seconds, I asked her: “Is this any good?” It was such a simple “opener”.

I looked at her and smiled. She smiled too.

The whole meeting went something like this:

We talked a little about the movie. We then agreed that it looked too goofy. So we walked around the store for a couple of minutes to find a better one. We found one. Talked some more.

I asked her what she was doing at a video store on a saturday night. I found out she was also tired coming back from New York just a few hours earlier. We agreed to chat more about movies and travelling another day over a cup of tea. Exchanged numbers.

I just had this incredible feeling in my stomach on my way home. The whole conversation just went so smooth and natural. I never got to see the movie I rented though; I was too tired when I got back home.

Always be socially prepared

This is just one of those stories. You always have to be prepared to meet people! If I had excused myself by saying that I was too tired, I would probably never have seen her again.

There is a saying that goes something like “You don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone”. There’s a lot of truth in that. Another good one is this: “Every friend you have was a stranger before you met him. (or her, in this case)”

It’s all about taking some chances in life.

Who cares if you screw up? Seriously! It happens to everyone. Look at every failure as a win instead of a loss. Now you know more about how not to do what you were trying to do.

It’s brilliant. Even the best soccer players only have a pass completion rate of 60-70%. You really don’t have to “win” all the time to be good. Not at all.

Start a conversation in your local Blockbuster

Be interested. This is really key. Listening is so important.

Walk up to someone and ask them politely about something. Or just say hello and smile.

You can ask about anything related to movies: Do you have any recommendations? Something here I shouldn’t rent? The question isn’t the most important thing, it’s the answer.

Be social

I don’t think I would have had the nerve to go up and talk to Lisa if it wasn’t because I am already a social guy. It would have felt weird. But it wasn’t weird at all to start a conversation, it was incredibly fun and simple.

And that’s because I have done it a thousand times.

When I started getting this area of my life handled, I talked to a lot of people. Old, fat, ugly, men, children, women, dwarfs, everyone. Talking to children is hilarious by the way.

I started out with really small conversations. After a while they got longer. It’s actually a lot of fun!

You too can be more social

Start out easy. Just get used to talking to strangers. A good way is to talk to people in stores and shops. Say hi, smile, ask about where something is located and say thanks. So simple. After a while you’ll be able to talk to more people. It’s all about getting used to opening your mouth to strangers.

Commit to it. Say to yourself that you’re going to talk to 60 strangers in 30 days. Whatever!

Just do something about it.

Always ask questions, and listen to the answers. Always listen! It’s so powerful to be a good listener.

Think about it; We learn to speak, we learn to talk, but we don’t learn to listen. Do yourself the favour to really hear what people are saying. It opens up whole new worlds of communication.

That’s it for now guys, hope you enjoyed. And I’m glad to be back!

As always, if you haven’t yet, get the free dating tips first by Email or RSS.

Image by Beija Floor.

You’re standing there, shaking. You’re mind is entirely blocked out. Sweating. Your tongue won’t let you speak. Heart rate rising. The world moves very fast, or very slow. Muscles are tight.

Fear. It’s a strange thing. Few things provoke such strong physical reactions.

It can be the worst thing in the world. But it doesn’t have to be… Read on.

Before we can use it, we have to know what causes it.

What is fear?

Chemicals such as adrenaline and the stress hormone cortisol are released into the blood stream causing certain physical reactions such as:

• More sweating
• Blood pressure rises
• Tightening of muscles
• Rapid heart rate
• Sharpened or redirected senses

All these reactions are protective mechanisms to increase our chances of survival.

When speaking of human mechanisms, you can always go back to when we “lived in caves” to find the use and cause.

We often experience fear when we are found in a situation that can lead to death. Because as humans, we basically only have one goal: To survive.

The best way to do that is to reproduce, because no one lives forever. And you can’t reproduce when you’re dead, right? (Yet…)

Great, so we know we have to survive. Our body helps us with that in “dangerous” situations.

But when it comes to daily life, fear doesn’t help us much. It holds us back.

A social situation that can make lots of guys get all anxious is to walk up to a girl and start a conversation.

Kiss your fear goodnight

We’re able to climb mountains, ride cars with 250km/h, travel to the moon, you get the drill…

But most guys aren’t even able to walk up to a cute girl and say hi! Amazing, isn’t it?

The first thing you have to get into place to make that happen is to really want it. Make a commitment to it. Get really motivated.

Say to yourself one day, “I’m going to get out, find a cute girl, and talk to her”. Really feel that you’re going to do it. Picture a conversation in your head.

Maybe it wasn’t harder than that. Maybe you did it right away. If yes, great!

But, maybe you freezed, or made up some dumb excuse to not talk to her. Maybe you felt that there wasn’t “any girls worth talking to”. There are lots of maybes.

If you did go out and meet someone, then this post really isn’t directed at you. You’re doing great! Getting over “approach anxiety” is a really important step in getting success with women.

Let’s take a look at those who did not do it. I was one of them for quite a few years.

Not too long ago, I would rather take a bullet than walk up to a stranger. Today is a little different…

The first step is to admit to yourself that you were afraid. You looked fear in he’s eyes, and you lost. That’s cool though, just admit it.

Drop all the excuses; it’s just your ego protecting you.

Really look into what you felt at the moment you saw a woman you wanted to talk to. What did you think? Did you see or feel any signs of fear, such as a faster heartbeat?

The next time you give it a shot, try to just let it all in. Let the fear in completely, don’t try to fight it or hold it back. If you’re able to do this, it won’t take long before you make your first approach.

Easy exercise if you want to meet women on the street

Ask for the time.

Notice how you’re acting when you’re about to do something as non-threatening as asking for the time.

You will probably start out by saying “excuse me” to stop people. This works well in this scenario, but I do not advice it for stopping girls in general. It shows weakness. Why should you excuse for yourself?

After you have become comfortable with asking for the time, practice going up and saying “Hi! What’s the clock?”

Try not to excuse yourself. This is a bad habit to get into if you want to approach and attract women.

When you start out like this, it shouldn’t be too hard to start conversations with girls after a while. Try to do it one day. Again, notice all your thoughts and feelings. Let all the fear in.

Really try to approach no matter what your body is telling you. This is the only real way to overcome approach anxiety. Look fear in the eyes, and beat it.

Try it, and let me know how it goes!

Get free dating and approaching tips by email. Click here!

By the way, I am leaving to India tomorrow night. The next post will be published while I am away. So no responding to emails/comments from the 1st july to the 18th. Wish me a good trip guys!

Image #1 by haniamir, #2 by ucumari.

OK, so you want to get good with the ladies? Maybe even great? It takes practice, you know that.

You also know it won’t come overnight. It will take time.

So why are you only talking to girls on Friday and Saturday nights?!

By only talking to women on two days of the week, you’re significantly cutting down your chances of meeting someone amazing – and gaining a lot less practice!

Most of us see beautiful women on a daily basis. Might be a girl on the bus, in the supermarket, on the street, in a fashion store, it doesn’t matter.

So why are you only talking to girls on Friday and Saturday nights?!

This post might not be directed at you. Maybe you talk to women every day. Maybe you haven’t ever “approached” someone. But please, read on. You’ll learn something anyway.

Meeting women everywhere

When I first started out trying to meet women, I would only do it on the weekends. I thought that this was just the way it was supposed to work. I didn’t understand that there are no “rules” when it comes to dating. You make the rules.

I did think about approaching on the street. But not for many seconds at a time. I thought to myself that “she might be doing something important”, “she’s in a hurry” or some other wuss explanation I made up.

It’s not too long ago I realized that she would be lucky to meet me!

Of course I can take a minute out of her day. I might be the best thing ever happening to her.

And if she doesn’t agree? What if she has to do something really important and is in a hurry?

We will both just walk away, simple as that. At least I tried.

Did you try? What did you do the last time you saw a gorgeous lady? My bet is that you didn’t do anything. You just walked on.

You let her walk right out of your life.

Let go of your excuses

Realize that by just letting go of your excuses, you could be dating 10 times as much.

This really is “the secret” when it comes to dating. Having no excuses and making your own rules.

So what are you going to do the next time you see someone you would like to meet? Go up and say hi. Observe something. Comment on something. Get to know her. Listen.

Don’t just walk away. Don’t make excuses.

I promise you, it will be worth your time. And you’ll be worth hers.

Try it, and let me know what happens.

Image by Thomas Hawk.

Get more. For free. Free dating tips and advice by email!

Odds say that 53% of men is eyeing up a work colleague. That includes you.

But a lot of these guys don’t take any action, because lets be frank; we don’t want to embarrass ourselves in front of the whole company.

And you might lose your job. Maybe she might. Maybe you like it the way you can talk friendly to each other right now, and you don’t want any sour feelings between you.

There are 100′s of excuses and fears for not trying. But they don’t get you anywhere.

So let’s get down to business and see how you can approach her with minimum embarrassment and maximum results.

The how-to of dating women at work

• Get to know her in a casual way. As some wise guy once said, “start by laying the foundations”. This is very important when it comes to dating a work girl. Smoothly start to make small talk with her at the water cooler. Talk to her casually at lunch. Simply make sure that she knows your name and who you are.
• See her outside of work. Now that she knows who you are and you (may) have some friends in common, what would be more natural than grabbing a beer after work? Take 5-6 colleagues (including her) to a bar one day for a happy hour. Have fun! Be the guy that she would want to be with. Don’t flirt too heavily though, it’s best that she doesn’t know your dark intentions yet. This way there’s no pressure. At the bar, you can play a cute game with her. Remember that entertainment and fun is the most valuable values you can possess. So be fun, and have fun!
• Be alone with her. This is the natural next step. If you enjoy her company, and she enjoys yours, you should get to know each other better. Don’t go overboard with things just yet, take it easy. Casually ask her what she is doing for lunch one day, or do a project together. Maybe just meet up with her at the coffee machine for a five minute conversation. It’s important that it’s just you and her, as she will most likely start to see you in a slightly new light afterwards. Also, if she has had some dirty thoughts about you, being alone with you confirms to her that there aren’t going to be awkward silence when it’s just you two, which may have held her back. Remember this: It’s not a date. It’s just two co-workers having lunch. Keep it light!
• Check your progress. When you, her, and a bunch of colleagues are out together, how does she act? Does she keep coming over to you, talking to you, drinking with you, touching you? (Such as placing her hand on your arm, or your shoulder.) If yes, it’s time to go further. If she is interested in you (romantically), you should definitely go for it. If not, you have three options. Number one is to give up. If you and her isn’t going anywhere, this might be a good one. Don’t spend too much time or energy on one girl. Don’t stop talking to her altogether, just cool down a little. Number two is to keep doing what you’re doing. If you’re making slow but steady progress, this is a good idea. Just move things forward slowly. If you’re not, Number 3 is to change your approach. Do something new and different. If what you’re doing doesn’t work, do something else.
• Ask her out. If everything has been going as it should, asking her out should be easy as cake. You want to get to know her better, and you feel attracted to each other. Go get her tiger!

With this approach, you run (almost) no chances. Until you’re sure that you get positive signs from her, you keep it very fun and friendly.

But when the signs do come, you turn it up a notch. Nothing too heavily, especially not in front of your work mates, but make sure to always more forward. Remember the “Two steps forward, one step back” rule.

Following these simple tips, you shouldn’t have a hard time dating girls from work. The most important things to remember is to keep it fun, keep it light and keep it casual. Make it really natural and flowing, and lay off all pressure so it won’t get awkward.

There are no limitations

No practical post without a little bit of motivational speak…

Remember that “time never waits”. Our bodies change every second. We get older. The world moves on. So don’t be afraid of change!

Give it a chance. Don’t ever disregard anything without giving it a fair shot.

No girl is “out of your league”. Don’t ever worry about what life “would be like”. Try to live and take action instead. Your best is always enough. It’s better than enough.

Good luck soldier!
Alex

Field reports from the hard environment of the office is highly encouraged. Have a sweet love story that started at work? Maybe the opposite? Post in the comments!

You never know exactly when I post. So stop spending time checking in and start using RSS. I’ll send you my post by email when I publish something. Promise!

Image by chaos ensues.

Oh man, she was an 8.5!

The grading system. Most of us know it, many of us use it. Rating girls from numbers 1-10 based on their looks…

Isn’t it extremely childish? I think so.

Whenever I hear a man talking about that 6, 7, or the rare 10, I just shake my head. Ratings girls is for boys. Not for men.

Because grading is really all about acceptance. You only get high-fived by your pals if she’s an “8″.

Seeking others acceptance is a bad trait. It’s a big red sign of insecurity. And what’s the opposite of insecurity? Confidence.

And what is the number one trait that women look after in a man? Right. Confidence.

My 9.2 could be your 7.6

Just because you think that someone looks good doesn’t mean that I will. And that’s another flaw of this “system”.

Because really, who cares about what I think about the girl that you like?

Stop all the grading and rating.

Numbers are great for calendars. Numbers dictate a lot of stuff in our lives.

But they shouldn’t have anything to say about who we choose to be with!

So I present to you a new system

It’s so revolutionary, you can’t even imagine.

What about grading girls by a yes, a maybe or a no?

If she’s a yes, go get her tiger.

If she’s a no, don’t worry about her.

But if she’s a maybe – you have to change her to either a yes or a no! And how do you do that?

You go over and talk to her!

Simple as that. Find out if she’s a yes or a no. How will you ever know anyway? Going over to talk to her is the only way to be sure. She might have a great personality, a smile you didn’t notice right away, or something else.

If you have talked for a little while, and still isn’t sure, just get her number. Take her out to coffee someday day and continue the conversation. It really is that easy.

What do you think?

Let’s start up a little discussion in the comments – Is it childish, or is it perfectly OK to rate girls?

If yes, why?

Image by max.

Get more insight to the world of success with women by subscribing to the RSS feed.

* The “yes, maybe, no” system was not “invented” by me. I first heard it in a David Wygant podcast.

“I am not good looking enough to be with her”. “I am too fat”. “I’m not funny enough”.

Self limiting beliefs – your worst enemy when it comes to dating.

Ever experienced one of the above thoughts yourself? I know you have.

In some way, at some point, I know you have limited yourself. And I’m no exception myself. Actually most of us do it all the time.

Just before you approach a girl, there’s a good chance you see a lot of frightening images.

Her slapping you down, and then just standing there laughing at you. You actually feel humiliated before you even talk to her.

And then what happens? You decide it’s better to not approach her. You walk away.

You beat yourself up over it later. You find 100′s of things you could have said, but didn’t.

This is what used to happen for me.

Now I just go over and say hi

I have realized that I have nothing to lose. I know for sure that she’s not going to slap me or anything like that.

If she’s not interested (which in that case would be her loss…) I simply walk away myself. Fair enough, I gave it a shot.

You can also think of it this way:

What’s the chance of you hooking up with her if you don’t approach her? Near zero.

What’s the chance if you do? For beginners, I’d say about 15-20%. Maybe more or less, it comes down to a lot of things.

But the point is, you actually have a pretty decent chance of getting laid in the future if you just approach a few girls.

And getting laid is better than not getting laid, right?

It’s almost just math. Some girls will not be into you. That’s life.

But some will, and it’s here the real “opportunity” arises. If you just approach a few girls each day, you have a very good chance of meeting someone great once in a while.

And if you don’t fuck it up, you might end up getting a quality girlfriend. Someone to come home to, to hold tight, to kiss, to please.

Or to do whatever you want, that’s out of my scope. But having one (or more) quality girls in your life is fantastic.

It’s a lot of hard work, especially at first, but I can assure you that it’s worth it.

The feeling that you have (almost) total control over your dating life is really incredible. And it’s just a positive spiral.

Getting rid of self limiting beliefs

• Identify the self limiting belief. One of the most common is that you’re in some way not attractive enough to be with really good looking women.
• Find out why you have it. This is important. Usually it’s because of something that happened years ago. It may have been your father yelling at you saying that you’re “too dumb”, or some girl saying you need to lose a few kilos. Not important. You just have to realize that “looking back makes you fall over what’s in front of you“.
• Eliminate the problem. If you think you’re too fat; you have two options. Either you lose weight, or you decide with yourself that it’s not important when it comes to dating. It’s easier to fix the root of the problem than fixing the “branches”. If you think you’re not attractive enough, do what you can to look good, and then decide that you’re the best looking man in the world.
• Stick to your new belief. Whenever you try to say to yourself that you’re too fat, or you’re not “hot” enough, change it. Say that you’re almost too hot. Say that you’re dangerously ripped. Anything else than your old belief.

So I just wanted this to be a short motivational post, and I hope it can help you decide that you are good enough, and that it’s only a matter of approaching her to get to know her. It’s really quite simple.

If you need help with these sort of things, I highly recommend you to subscribe to my RSS feed. I bring fresh dating tips here every week.

And before you leave, make sure to leave a comment with your views on self limiting beliefs and approaching girls in the comments section below.

Thanks and see you soon,
Alex

Image by nebe.

Yesterday I got this really big urge to go get a McFlurry at my local McDonald’s… I know, I know. I’m bad, but it’s not my fault McFlurry’s are soo good?

Anyway, I got my ice cream, and sat down at a table to enjoy it.

I was almost finished, when this really amazing smell walked right by my nose.

I looked up, and found myself drooling over the most stunning girl I have ever seen (in a McDonald’s). She was around 1.76, long blonde hair, and a really mysterious and sexy face.

I quickly threw the rest of my McFlurry away, and walked right behind her up to the counter.

When we both stood in line next to each other, I turned around, and padded her on her shoulder. She looked at me, with a kind of shocking look like “what the f*** was I doing?”.

I looked her directly in the eyes and asked “Don’t I know you from somewhere?”

She just said “no” in a kind of politely-I-don’t-want-you-to-ask-me-out way, like lots of girls behave when they think they are getting “picked-up”.

But I turned around and said: “Yees, I’m pretty sure I do. You’re that fat chick in *some movie*, right?”, and before she got a chance to reply, I followed with “But I see you have lost a lot of weight… and now you’re back at McDonald’s to put it back on? Shame on you!”

At first she seemed to get pretty mad at me, but I just had this “you’re so sexy when you’re mad” face on, and after a second or two, she started laughing, and playfully hitting me on the arm.

She bought me a drink

At the time it was our turn to order, I had already asked her if she “wanted to grab a quick bite and talk some more”. Actually she was just there to pick-up some crushed ice for a party, but she said that she “liked my style”, and that she would buy me a coke.

Not bad for just 3 minutes of conversation, right?

At first she ordered a small one for me, but I quickly stepped in and told her that “If she wanted to have any chances with me, she’d better buy me a big one”.

So a big one I got.

Getting to know her

We sat down, and the conversation went great.

I found out her name was Anna, that she was from Sweden, and that she was a singer, doing modelling as a side job.

After a few more minutes, I went through the routine called “Strawberry Field’s”

It’s a game you can play with a girl, kind of like this one.

Strawberry Fields

Me: “You’re walking along a road, and you come across a strawberry field. How high is the fence?”

Anna: “1 meter.”

Me: “hmm…” looking quizzical at her.

Anna: “What? What?”

Me: “Ok, you get inside. How many strawberries do you eat?”

Anna: Looks like she is thinking. “8″

Me: “8! Wow! Oh my god! I could never take you home to my mother!”

Anna: “What! WHAT!?” touching my arm and pulling on me.

Me: “Ok, last question. What about the farmer?”

Anna: “Did he see me?”

Me: *shakes head with astonished look* “Wow!”

Me: “Ok, here’s what it means. The fence means you have high goals and high aspirations. The strawberries stand for your sexual appetite.”

I shake my head again. “You’re suuuuch a baaaaad girl! Most people say one or two! You want 8!”

She starts giggling really hard, blushing too.

Me: “The farmer means you don’t care about the sexual situation as long as no one finds out.”

She laughs again, and then puts her hand on my chest and says, “No, I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings…”

Anna’s reaction

Our conversation continued, now with an even better energy flow, and it felt like we just “clicked”.

I had to go, so I asked her for her number, and she gave it to me without any hesitation. I kissed her on the cheek and whispered in her ear, “I’ll call you”.

So, here’s how to do it yourself

Me: “You’re walking along the street and you come upon a strawberry field. How high is the fence?”

Girl: (Usually shows me with hands)

Me: “That’s interesting.”

Me: “So, you get inside, how many strawberries do you eat?”

Girl: *Some answer*

As long as it’s 1 or more, I say: “Oh my god! X number! “You’re such a bad girl! I could never take you home to meet my family!”

Girl: “What? Whaaaat?” After that she is going nuts trying to get me to tell her more.

Me: “Now, what about that farmer?”

Girl: “There’s a farmer?”, “Did he see?”, or similar.

At this point, I look down and smile and just shake my head like I can’t believe it. Most of the time, she’ll literally be begging you to tell her.

The interpretation

I use the same basic interpretation each time:

1. Fence: “You have high goals and aspirations but not so high you can’t reach them.”
2. # Of strawberries: “You said x-number, you baaad girl, that stands for your sex drive. Most people say 1, but you said *8*. God have mercy, I’d never get any sleep at all!”
3. Farmer: “Has to do with society’s rules on relationships. So you just go with your feelings and don’t allow other people to run your life.”

If you have any questions about this, feel free to ask them in the comments form below.

Otherwise, just have fun with this little game, and make sure to report back your results.

Take care guys,
Alex

Want more great games like this? Subscribe to my RSS Feed to get them before anyone else!

Photo by diskostu

This game is by no means my invention. I read about it in a Captain Jack newsletter a while ago, and I give all credit to him. Parts of this article is actually his words. I have also recently added him to my recommended page.